Developmental Stages: 2 yr old vs. 5th grader

I have come to the conclusion that while working with 5th-6th graders that they are very similar to my two year old son. The other week I was reading that these two developmental stages are two of the biggest of a human life. Both groups are experiencing growth and body changes, they question everything and are processing how you will react when they go opposite, they go through volunteers and seem to be the hardest to recruit for; but yet they are in their own way in dire need of adults impacting their lives!

I have made several mistakes as a dad while trying to get my son to do something only to watch him process what I am saying and do the opposite. Within my reaction, I lose an opportunity to come alongside him and work through his processing. One of the biggest mistakes I have ever had with a young man should have taught me better. I had a tough group of inter-city guys in my cabin at summer camp. These kids wouldn't listen to anyone or anything! They pushed boundaries, they got in verbal and physical fights, and tested my twenty year old personality. At one point, I lost it and yelled at the top of my lungs at the boys. In that moment, I lost credibility and severed my opportunity to love and invest in them. In fact, I still have a negative report card that I have kept with me that says; "What did you dislike about camp?" the response: "My counselor yelled at us." Never recovered a relationship with at least one of the boys. I did work hard to earn back respect and even made a promise that if they could get along that we would camp out at a special cabin and I would make pizza on the fire for them. This got their interest, especially seeing they were from the city and didn't have campfires. The night came and sure enough it poured down raining. Not wanting to break my promise, I got permission to use the fireplace in the gym and left the campers with my junior counselor as I went to retrieve the pizza supplies. When I came back, I was shocked at what I saw. Kids were crying, hugging each other and asking for forgiveness. What had happened! One kid had started the conversation saying that he had a lot of anger because his dad had left him, which snowballed and I would soon find out that three quarter of my campers had lost their dad. To some their dad walked out on them and to others their dads were in jail. Wow, heavy. These kids needed love and the last thing they needed was an older male yelling at them...Only through the Holy Spirit working and breaking these hearts and finding a common ground; made this the best week of camp for me and one I will remember for ever. It not only taught me to watch my words; it taught me that ever kid has a story and they need to be invested and loved on.

Sure their bodies are changing, man, do they smell at times, especially after lots of fun in the gym and you go into a small room...yes, they question things. My best questions about the Bible have come from this age group. "Were there dinosaurs on the ark?" "Jesus sinned, what about the tables at the temple?" They do tend to do the opposite thing that you ask of them; and they will test your limits. Granted, all they really desire is for you to get to know them and let them get to know you. They want someone to care. They are not a kid but yet they are not a teen. They are stuck in this awkward stage and could use you to invest in them. No worries on your age, I am getting old, 34 to be exact, and I don't have a clue to some of these games they are playing, but I ask them about it and have them explain it to me. I believe they get so much enjoyment at explaining it to me and in the back of my mind, I am thinking "I have no clue what they are talking about!" But I go on listening and they go on telling me the in and outs of their world. Take some time to think about this time in your life...we need people investing in the lives of a two year old or a 5th grader; do not let this awkward stage scare you from impacting them for Jesus.